Wow, it's been a full year since I've posted a rant, here. I guess I might be mellowing.
I know the world isn't fair, but something happened today that made me question some people's expectations and subsequent sense of entitlement and ME, ME, ME approach to life.
I was in the local grocery store picking up lunch from the deli. They have a lunch special: one entree and two sides for $5. This is a pretty good deal, considering that the same sized container filled with salad and sides from the salad bar would cost more than $5, and with this one you can get an actual entree like meat loaf or a chicken breast. I usually get chicken salad and two green salad sides. Not bad for $5.
Today there was a guy in front of me who ordered meat loaf and two sides, and when he got his to-go box, he looked at it and asked for a larger portion of meat since he was a big guy (specifically, "I weigh 300 pounds.") Um, really? Since when do you get to super-size for free based on your bulk? He was told to get permission from the manager, which he did. The deli guy placed a second (full) piece of meat loaf into his $5 box, and off the guy went.
Let's think about this for a moment. If you go to a fast-food place, can you get a triple burger for the same price as a single or double because you are a large person?
Can you go to a grocery and get two loaves of bread for the price of one because you make double-decker sandwiches?
Can just anyone now get more than the "normal" portion based on the fact that they are bigger than average?
Last I looked, a fixed price was a fixed price, and servings were defined based on "portion size". If I don't like the size of a normal serving, I am free to order more, but I sure expect to pay for it.
Some people just amaze me.
Showing posts with label Whining. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Whining. Show all posts
Friday, January 18, 2013
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Lines
Lines. We all dislike them, but you know what? If there is a line for something, it means there are more people wanting a particular service (demand) than that service can be provided (supply). So people wait their turn until they can be served.The next person in line is the next person to be served.
Same is true with traffic, but a little different. If there is a line, that means there are more cars that want to be somewhere than the road can handle, so people cue up and wait to merge. In general, "merge" works best with every-other-car, or, as a co-worker once said, "the zipper method". One car from one lane, one car from the next lane. Everyone keeps moving.
Let's examine the past hour of my life, where I encountered both of these situations.
First: traffic. I believe in the every-other-car merge. I ALWAYS leave a several-car opening in front of me to allow a car to merge into traffic. I also expect the car behind that one to merge in behind me. Instead, what happens most often is either (1) that second car trying to merge will speed up and zoom past the merging car so it can get closer to the front of the line. Or (2), the second car trying to merge will ride the bumper of the first car (the one I let in) and attempt to do a 2-car merge in front of me. This pisses me off. What sense of entitlement does this second person have that they can't come in behind me?
Let's move on to the people line. Standing in line at the grill for breakfast. Two people in front of me, one behind me. Cook is cooking. Two guys wander over and stand in front of the line. It's like none of us existed. As soon as the cook turned around to see who was next, these two guys actually stepped forward and started to order! The cook, thank heavens, looked to his right, saw the line, and addressed us instead. These two guys made no effort to get in line; they just stood there until the cook had asked all of us for our orders.
Now don't get me wrong. There are times I will gladly let someone in front of me, like at the grocery store checkout - when someone has only one or two items, I'll let them go ahead of me. Or in a long line in the ladies' room, I'll let someone with a small child go ahead of me. But other times? That line is there for a reason, and YOU don't get to decided you go first. The people already there before you get to make that decision. It's called civility.
I do not understand any of this, but the sense of entitlement, the sense of me-me-me, the inability to "play nice" is all starting to make me want to be a hermit and just stay home. Seriously.
Same is true with traffic, but a little different. If there is a line, that means there are more cars that want to be somewhere than the road can handle, so people cue up and wait to merge. In general, "merge" works best with every-other-car, or, as a co-worker once said, "the zipper method". One car from one lane, one car from the next lane. Everyone keeps moving.
Let's examine the past hour of my life, where I encountered both of these situations.
First: traffic. I believe in the every-other-car merge. I ALWAYS leave a several-car opening in front of me to allow a car to merge into traffic. I also expect the car behind that one to merge in behind me. Instead, what happens most often is either (1) that second car trying to merge will speed up and zoom past the merging car so it can get closer to the front of the line. Or (2), the second car trying to merge will ride the bumper of the first car (the one I let in) and attempt to do a 2-car merge in front of me. This pisses me off. What sense of entitlement does this second person have that they can't come in behind me?
Let's move on to the people line. Standing in line at the grill for breakfast. Two people in front of me, one behind me. Cook is cooking. Two guys wander over and stand in front of the line. It's like none of us existed. As soon as the cook turned around to see who was next, these two guys actually stepped forward and started to order! The cook, thank heavens, looked to his right, saw the line, and addressed us instead. These two guys made no effort to get in line; they just stood there until the cook had asked all of us for our orders.
Now don't get me wrong. There are times I will gladly let someone in front of me, like at the grocery store checkout - when someone has only one or two items, I'll let them go ahead of me. Or in a long line in the ladies' room, I'll let someone with a small child go ahead of me. But other times? That line is there for a reason, and YOU don't get to decided you go first. The people already there before you get to make that decision. It's called civility.
I do not understand any of this, but the sense of entitlement, the sense of me-me-me, the inability to "play nice" is all starting to make me want to be a hermit and just stay home. Seriously.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
The Good Ole Days
Yesterday, someone on Twitter asked what we'd do if the Internet suddenly went away. My immediate response was "I'd be out of a job", but after what I just went through trying to pay a bill online, I'm not so sure the lack of Internet would be so awful.
Caveat: I have never, ever, had a problem paying any bills, nor had a credit card declined, so this was all foreign territory for me. Being anal-retentive has its benefits.
Let's review the events of the past 2 hours:
I go online to get my invoice for the Water Club I manage for the department (in my spare time) and I see that my bill is past due. Crap, I forgot to pay it the end of last month. Now I owe for 2 months. No problem, we collect in advance, so we're covered.
Coworker: You might want to consider keeping all our money in checking and setting up auto-payments so you don't forget again.
Me: But we earn interest on Savings.
Coworker: Is it worth the $1 we earn to go through all this?
Me: I'll check on the interest and get back with you.
I go to transfer money from my Credit Union (CU) savings account into checking so my debit card (my ONLY debit card) will be funded. I forgot half the secret codes to get logged in to my CU. Third try I got in and did the transfer. Sigh.
I go back to the bill I need to pay, fill in the form with all the appropriate secret passwords and codes, and hit Submit.
"There was a problem processing your payment. Please try again later."
About 20 minutes later, I tried again with the same result. Sigh.
I called the company to see if they could tell me what was wrong. No problems with the payment service, so it must be my card. She checked and payment was declined.
Me: Okay, can you tell me why?
Her: No, I'll need to process it again to get the error code.
We do this, and she tells me my card was declined. [pregnant pause]
Me: Um, do you know why?
Her: No, you'll have to call your bank.
I go downstairs to the CU to see if they can tell me why my card was declined. Apparently there's a daily limit to a debit card transaction, and since I was trying to pay for 2 months, I'd exceeded it. She offered to bump my limit temporarily so I could run back to my desk and pay the bill.
She also noted that there was a $1 hold on my account by the other company. Apparently they do that to verify the validity of the card, and when mine failed, they put a lock on that $1, so I had to pay $1 less than the amount of the bill. Grumble.
Back to my desk. I log in to pay the bill and there is no credit card listed any more. Sigh.
I call the company back.
Me: Where did my credit card information go?
Them: Oh, we automatically wipe it out when a card is declined for any reason.
Me: But the card wasn't bad. There was a limit by my CU I'd exceeded.
Them: No matter - we treat them all the same for security reasons.
Me: Can you put it back?
Them: I can key it in for you, or you can key it yourself (read: start over).
I go back to the payment site and key it back in, setting myself up for automatic payments.
"There was a problem processing your request. Please try again later."
At this point, I was ready to scream. Yeah, it took me that long.
I unchecked "automatic payments" and it let me add the credit card back in.
I paid the bill minus the $1.
The remaining $1will be paid to them on the 15th of the month. Good.
Tomorrow I'll look into setting up automatic payments. My coworker is correct - this is not worth the $1 we earn each month on our Savings balance. Totally not.
So here I sit, 2 hours later, and I've just managed to pay a bill. I don't get paid to do this. I do this "in my spare time" as a service to my entire department. No one else wants the job, and they will pay me extra if I stop asking them to take it.
If we didn't have the Internet, I would have written a check to the water company, put it in an envelope, added a $.44 stamp, and stuck it in the mail box in our mail room. It would have taken about 5 minutes. This is a perfect example of why I still have a check book, and why some days I wish it was 1965 again. Okay, maybe 1977. My "good old days".
Caveat: I have never, ever, had a problem paying any bills, nor had a credit card declined, so this was all foreign territory for me. Being anal-retentive has its benefits.
Let's review the events of the past 2 hours:
I go online to get my invoice for the Water Club I manage for the department (in my spare time) and I see that my bill is past due. Crap, I forgot to pay it the end of last month. Now I owe for 2 months. No problem, we collect in advance, so we're covered.
Coworker: You might want to consider keeping all our money in checking and setting up auto-payments so you don't forget again.
Me: But we earn interest on Savings.
Coworker: Is it worth the $1 we earn to go through all this?
Me: I'll check on the interest and get back with you.
I go to transfer money from my Credit Union (CU) savings account into checking so my debit card (my ONLY debit card) will be funded. I forgot half the secret codes to get logged in to my CU. Third try I got in and did the transfer. Sigh.
I go back to the bill I need to pay, fill in the form with all the appropriate secret passwords and codes, and hit Submit.
"There was a problem processing your payment. Please try again later."
About 20 minutes later, I tried again with the same result. Sigh.
I called the company to see if they could tell me what was wrong. No problems with the payment service, so it must be my card. She checked and payment was declined.
Me: Okay, can you tell me why?
Her: No, I'll need to process it again to get the error code.
We do this, and she tells me my card was declined. [pregnant pause]
Me: Um, do you know why?
Her: No, you'll have to call your bank.
I go downstairs to the CU to see if they can tell me why my card was declined. Apparently there's a daily limit to a debit card transaction, and since I was trying to pay for 2 months, I'd exceeded it. She offered to bump my limit temporarily so I could run back to my desk and pay the bill.
She also noted that there was a $1 hold on my account by the other company. Apparently they do that to verify the validity of the card, and when mine failed, they put a lock on that $1, so I had to pay $1 less than the amount of the bill. Grumble.
Back to my desk. I log in to pay the bill and there is no credit card listed any more. Sigh.
I call the company back.
Me: Where did my credit card information go?
Them: Oh, we automatically wipe it out when a card is declined for any reason.
Me: But the card wasn't bad. There was a limit by my CU I'd exceeded.
Them: No matter - we treat them all the same for security reasons.
Me: Can you put it back?
Them: I can key it in for you, or you can key it yourself (read: start over).
I go back to the payment site and key it back in, setting myself up for automatic payments.
"There was a problem processing your request. Please try again later."
At this point, I was ready to scream. Yeah, it took me that long.
I unchecked "automatic payments" and it let me add the credit card back in.
I paid the bill minus the $1.
The remaining $1will be paid to them on the 15th of the month. Good.
Tomorrow I'll look into setting up automatic payments. My coworker is correct - this is not worth the $1 we earn each month on our Savings balance. Totally not.
So here I sit, 2 hours later, and I've just managed to pay a bill. I don't get paid to do this. I do this "in my spare time" as a service to my entire department. No one else wants the job, and they will pay me extra if I stop asking them to take it.
If we didn't have the Internet, I would have written a check to the water company, put it in an envelope, added a $.44 stamp, and stuck it in the mail box in our mail room. It would have taken about 5 minutes. This is a perfect example of why I still have a check book, and why some days I wish it was 1965 again. Okay, maybe 1977. My "good old days".
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Why?
My day, and why I need a massage every 2 weeks. I actually need it weekly, but I like to eat, so I sacrifice. Here are today's burning "Why" questions:
1. Why do you think it is okay to turn right from the left lane? Do you not see there are cars in the right lane? Do you not see the sign over your lane that indicates you may go straight or turn left ONLY? Why do you think you have the right-of-way over the cars in the right lane, or the oncoming cars turning left? Are you TOO GOOD to get in line like the rest of us and wait for the light? Where are you going that is so important that you are special?
2. Why do you think it is okay to exit left from the right lane? Do you not see there are cars in the left lane? Why is lack of planning on your part suddenly imposed on several others who have to stop to prevent them from slamming into you, thus backing up traffic even more? Are you TOO GOOD to think about the fact that there is an exit coming up and maybe you should be in the proper lane to start with?
3. Why do you wait until your merge/transition lane is gone and you are driving on the shoulder to begin your merge? Why do you feel a God-given right to stick your car into moving traffic without the benefit of a turn signal to indicate your intent? Why do you feel the need to flip the finger at everyone who failed to stop traffic to let you in? What part of this is not YOUR doing?
4. Why do you feel it is okay to cross a double solid white line (which indicates the exit has already been defined, and you are past it) and create a second lane in the one-lane exit, bypassing all the cars already legally in that lane, then push your way into the waiting cars so you can exit? Do you really need to get to work that much faster than the rest of us?
(Caution: change in topic.)
5. Why is your music on so loud that it is blaring from your ear phones to the point where you could not hear me say "excuse me" after YOU stopped dead in your tracks, totally unaware that anyone else was in the world, causing me to bump into you? Then, after you grudgingly acknowledged my existence, why did you give me the evil eye as if this was somehow MY fault?
6. Why was I so upset/confused/dismayed after listening to that NPR piece on teens so addicted to texting they felt they could not possibly be expected to drive without texting? Why do these kids feel it is okay? Even after one of them was in two serious accidents because she was texting while driving? What part of distracted driving (and to an inexperienced driver, at that) is not clear here? *I* cannot even get my cell phone out of my purse while driving without losing focus, and I have been driving 3 times longer than these kids are old! Why do they feel this would be such an imposition on their lives? What do they freaking have to say that cannot wait until they get to where you are going?!?! Is a life in danger? Then SHUT UP AND DRIVE.
7. Why, when I went to the Post Office the other day, were three out of four people on their cell phones while waiting in line? What do you have to say that cannot wait until you leave the Post Office? Do you honestly think I want to listen to your conversation about your doctor's appointment, or what you need to do when you get home, or why you think that guy likes you? Put a sock in it!
7.5. Why (while we are on the subject of the Post Office) do you think you can walk in to the PO with a shopping bag and start packaging up your item to be mailed? Did you not think of the shipping part of this when you bought the item? Are you aware that other places sell boxes and tape? Do you know how much smoother things go when your item is ready to ship before you get into line? Do you think it is the responsibility of the Postal Service worker at the window to help you tape up your package? Why can some of us manage to do this at home? And DO NOT ask me to let you in front of me in line because you have already been here so long. YOU ARE NOT IN LINE YET, so move to the end, bucko.
8. WHY did I not see those awesome Hostess cupcakes in the vending machine at work until I was leaving? I just KNOW they could have helped me fell better about all of this.
1. Why do you think it is okay to turn right from the left lane? Do you not see there are cars in the right lane? Do you not see the sign over your lane that indicates you may go straight or turn left ONLY? Why do you think you have the right-of-way over the cars in the right lane, or the oncoming cars turning left? Are you TOO GOOD to get in line like the rest of us and wait for the light? Where are you going that is so important that you are special?
2. Why do you think it is okay to exit left from the right lane? Do you not see there are cars in the left lane? Why is lack of planning on your part suddenly imposed on several others who have to stop to prevent them from slamming into you, thus backing up traffic even more? Are you TOO GOOD to think about the fact that there is an exit coming up and maybe you should be in the proper lane to start with?
3. Why do you wait until your merge/transition lane is gone and you are driving on the shoulder to begin your merge? Why do you feel a God-given right to stick your car into moving traffic without the benefit of a turn signal to indicate your intent? Why do you feel the need to flip the finger at everyone who failed to stop traffic to let you in? What part of this is not YOUR doing?
4. Why do you feel it is okay to cross a double solid white line (which indicates the exit has already been defined, and you are past it) and create a second lane in the one-lane exit, bypassing all the cars already legally in that lane, then push your way into the waiting cars so you can exit? Do you really need to get to work that much faster than the rest of us?
(Caution: change in topic.)
5. Why is your music on so loud that it is blaring from your ear phones to the point where you could not hear me say "excuse me" after YOU stopped dead in your tracks, totally unaware that anyone else was in the world, causing me to bump into you? Then, after you grudgingly acknowledged my existence, why did you give me the evil eye as if this was somehow MY fault?
6. Why was I so upset/confused/dismayed after listening to that NPR piece on teens so addicted to texting they felt they could not possibly be expected to drive without texting? Why do these kids feel it is okay? Even after one of them was in two serious accidents because she was texting while driving? What part of distracted driving (and to an inexperienced driver, at that) is not clear here? *I* cannot even get my cell phone out of my purse while driving without losing focus, and I have been driving 3 times longer than these kids are old! Why do they feel this would be such an imposition on their lives? What do they freaking have to say that cannot wait until they get to where you are going?!?! Is a life in danger? Then SHUT UP AND DRIVE.
7. Why, when I went to the Post Office the other day, were three out of four people on their cell phones while waiting in line? What do you have to say that cannot wait until you leave the Post Office? Do you honestly think I want to listen to your conversation about your doctor's appointment, or what you need to do when you get home, or why you think that guy likes you? Put a sock in it!
7.5. Why (while we are on the subject of the Post Office) do you think you can walk in to the PO with a shopping bag and start packaging up your item to be mailed? Did you not think of the shipping part of this when you bought the item? Are you aware that other places sell boxes and tape? Do you know how much smoother things go when your item is ready to ship before you get into line? Do you think it is the responsibility of the Postal Service worker at the window to help you tape up your package? Why can some of us manage to do this at home? And DO NOT ask me to let you in front of me in line because you have already been here so long. YOU ARE NOT IN LINE YET, so move to the end, bucko.
8. WHY did I not see those awesome Hostess cupcakes in the vending machine at work until I was leaving? I just KNOW they could have helped me fell better about all of this.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Frustrating Day In Muddville
Is Muddville spelled with one or two 'd's? Sigh.
I tell ya, when I leave the office, my day is supposed to get better, not worse. But when I am surrounded by stoopid people driving objects of destruction and not paying attention, can you tell it irritates me just a little bit??!?!
First up: Lady in large View-blocker (SUV), holding cell phone in her right hand and gesturing with her left. Holding the steering wheel with ... what? Not her teeth, because her mouth never stopped moving. For miles. I even took various back roads to try and shake her, but she hugged my bumper, for miles. Amazing she did not hit me.
Next up: Woman in front of me driving 10 mph below the speed limit in the left lane. Would.not.speed.up. I could not get into the right lane to pass her because all the people behind me were doing that and cutting me off. Idiots. I finally got around her after a few miles. Grrrrrrr....
Then I went to the grocery store - had to pick up an Rx. Leaving the store, there was a car stopped in the driving lane. Well, actually, both lanes, since she was in the middle of the two lanes, just stopped. I stepped into the cross walk and looked at her to make sure she did not plan to start moving. Nope - she was too busy texting on her cell to even notice I was there. Then once I was about 2/3 of the way across, she started moving (surprise!) and turned into the lane in which I was walking. She drove reeeeal slooooowly, like she was following me to my spot, then she sped up and I looked over - still texting. She went past a few open spaces, then stopped. As a guy started to back out of his spot, she threw her vehicle into reverse and almost nailed him. WT!?! She finally took her car out of reverse and pulled into one of the empty spots - still texting. I got into my car and left, and she was ... still texting. WHO THE HELL ARE THESE PEOPLE TALKING TO!?!?!?!
Ahem.
I get to the fabric store to pick up my sharpened scissors. As the line grew longer, one of the registers closed. CLOSED. When she finally got to me, she had no clue where to find the scissors, so she abandoned her post (line still growing). She was in slow motion the whole check-out time, then she informed me that even though the ticket says $42, she knows scissor sharpening is $3, and so she did not want me to be surprised. Note: This was a huge, heavy bag, obviously containing more than one pair of scissors. I looked at her and told her that there were multiple pairs of scissors in the bag, 14 to be exact, and 14 times 3 is 42, so that is the correct amount. She just did not want me to "wonder". I know she was just trying to help, but I wonder how she gets dressed in the morning. Oh, did I mention her hair was green with blue tints?
Then I get home. I had a message from my Rx company to call. It was a very...slow...speaking...voice...on...a...recording. Did I want to hear about a program about blah, blah, blah? Speak Yes or No after the tone. No. Okay, let us tell you about this blah, blah, blah program that is included at no extra cost with your plan. (What part of No was not clear, here?) blah, blah, blah ... Would you like to reconsider your answer. NO. Well, if you ever DO wish to reconsider ... aaaaaaaaagh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And just now, as I am typing this rant, I get a phone call from another machine - this time from my Dr's office. They have this automated system that calls you - over and over and over until you respond - to confirm your appt. To continue in English, please press 1. I LIVE IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO PRESS 1 FOR ENGLISH!
Stop the world, I want to get off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, I think I need a distraction. Hey, look, in just one short hour it will be my bed-time. I hope I am unwound by then .... at least typing all of this made me feel a little better. Sigh ...
I tell ya, when I leave the office, my day is supposed to get better, not worse. But when I am surrounded by stoopid people driving objects of destruction and not paying attention, can you tell it irritates me just a little bit??!?!
First up: Lady in large View-blocker (SUV), holding cell phone in her right hand and gesturing with her left. Holding the steering wheel with ... what? Not her teeth, because her mouth never stopped moving. For miles. I even took various back roads to try and shake her, but she hugged my bumper, for miles. Amazing she did not hit me.
Next up: Woman in front of me driving 10 mph below the speed limit in the left lane. Would.not.speed.up. I could not get into the right lane to pass her because all the people behind me were doing that and cutting me off. Idiots. I finally got around her after a few miles. Grrrrrrr....
Then I went to the grocery store - had to pick up an Rx. Leaving the store, there was a car stopped in the driving lane. Well, actually, both lanes, since she was in the middle of the two lanes, just stopped. I stepped into the cross walk and looked at her to make sure she did not plan to start moving. Nope - she was too busy texting on her cell to even notice I was there. Then once I was about 2/3 of the way across, she started moving (surprise!) and turned into the lane in which I was walking. She drove reeeeal slooooowly, like she was following me to my spot, then she sped up and I looked over - still texting. She went past a few open spaces, then stopped. As a guy started to back out of his spot, she threw her vehicle into reverse and almost nailed him. WT!?! She finally took her car out of reverse and pulled into one of the empty spots - still texting. I got into my car and left, and she was ... still texting. WHO THE HELL ARE THESE PEOPLE TALKING TO!?!?!?!
Ahem.
I get to the fabric store to pick up my sharpened scissors. As the line grew longer, one of the registers closed. CLOSED. When she finally got to me, she had no clue where to find the scissors, so she abandoned her post (line still growing). She was in slow motion the whole check-out time, then she informed me that even though the ticket says $42, she knows scissor sharpening is $3, and so she did not want me to be surprised. Note: This was a huge, heavy bag, obviously containing more than one pair of scissors. I looked at her and told her that there were multiple pairs of scissors in the bag, 14 to be exact, and 14 times 3 is 42, so that is the correct amount. She just did not want me to "wonder". I know she was just trying to help, but I wonder how she gets dressed in the morning. Oh, did I mention her hair was green with blue tints?
Then I get home. I had a message from my Rx company to call. It was a very...slow...speaking...voice...on...a...recording. Did I want to hear about a program about blah, blah, blah? Speak Yes or No after the tone. No. Okay, let us tell you about this blah, blah, blah program that is included at no extra cost with your plan. (What part of No was not clear, here?) blah, blah, blah ... Would you like to reconsider your answer. NO. Well, if you ever DO wish to reconsider ... aaaaaaaaagh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And just now, as I am typing this rant, I get a phone call from another machine - this time from my Dr's office. They have this automated system that calls you - over and over and over until you respond - to confirm your appt. To continue in English, please press 1. I LIVE IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO PRESS 1 FOR ENGLISH!
Stop the world, I want to get off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, I think I need a distraction. Hey, look, in just one short hour it will be my bed-time. I hope I am unwound by then .... at least typing all of this made me feel a little better. Sigh ...
Monday, March 2, 2009
Annoying to the Nth Degree
The person in the next cube is (1) cracking her gum, or (2) popping bubbles in bubble wrap. My vote (knowing the person) is (1) cracking her gum. Do I have permission to smack her? Why do people think this gum-cracking activity is okay? Do they not know others can hear them? Is it just me?
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Too Pooped To Rant, Maybe
I tend to compose blogs in my head while I drive. I think that tendency comes from a habit my college roommate had of speaking in newspaper article titles; for example: "College coed found dead; leaped from the roof after failing mid-term exam." or some such silliness. I spend a lot of time in the car, so I have a lot of time to mentally compose. I also have a lot of material, considering all the stupidity I witness in 15 short miles each way every day.
But tonight, even though I had the whole thing composed, I realize that as I sat down to type I simply do not have the energy to rant any more. I think they wore me out! Being surrounded by stupidity can be very tiring, obviously. Okay, okay, let me give it a try anyway!
They say you should not whine about something unless you also have a solution to suggest to correct the problem. Well, I do!!! Have a suggestion, that is. First, The Problem: Stupid drivers who do not care about the traffic laws which are there NOT to make our lives miserable, but to give some sense of order to the very dangerous task of maneuvering heavy machinery (2000+ pounds of metal on wheels counts as heavy machinery, in my book) with other people doing the same thing. There just HAVE to be rules or there would be anarchy. Apparently we have anarchy even with the rules, but I digress.
So my peeve du jour, and pretty much every jour, is that people do not follow the basic Driving 101 laws, and they think this is okay. And policemen apparently have way too much other stuff to do, so they cannot be bothered with policing the bumper-cars that is my daily commute. I swear, it's a miracle I get to and from work every day without being smashed to smithereens.
My solution? Deputize me! I will stop everyone I can and ticket them for blatantly breaking the law. And I'll do it cleverly disguised as a fellow commuter in a teeny tiny Miata. I'll keep the flashing red light hidden until I need to whip it out and make someone pull over. And I'll do it FOR FREE! I'll do it for the sheer joy of making someone see the error of their ways and put the fear of God into the rest of 'em.
What should you watch for when I have been granted my precious flashing red light? These are the things for which you will be stopped:
1. Changing lanes without using a directional (turn signal, that blinky thing).
2. Tailgating.
3. Changing lanes over and over and over again so you can get one car ahead of where you started.
4. Extra penalty for doing #3 without using a turn signal.
5. Making a one-lane exit into a two-lane exit because you are too good to wait in line like everyone else.
6. Passing on the shoulder because you cannot be bothered to wait until you get to the exit to exit.
7. Crossing a solid white line to merge.
8. Crossing a solid white line to merge without using a directional.
9. Crossing a double solid white line to merge.
10. Turning or exiting right from the left lane.
11. Sliding out of your lane while turning (you know, turning left into the far right lane.)
12. Entering the intersection when you cannot clear the intersection, even if your light is green.
13. Entering the intersection when you cannot clear the intersection when your light is red.
14. Not stopping for a stop sign (you live there, so they must be optional for you.)
15. Not stopping for pedestrians in crosswalks.
16. Tossing trash out the window while driving. This includes cigarette butts, people. Maryland is not your ashtray!
17. Crossing the double solid yellow lines in the middle of the street because a trash truck is stopped and in your way, and doing this without regard to the fact that there is oncoming traffic on the other side of said yellow lines.
18. Passing a stopped school bus with its red lights flashing because, well, just because you could, I guess.
19. Charging to the end of a merge lane so you can get as far up into traffic as you can, causing said moving traffic to stop to let you in, which backs traffic up several miles more than it already was. Forget that someone in a little green Miata left about 5 car lengths (your car lengths) of room for you to merge into moving traffic, but you were going so fast you blew past that opportunity.
20. Honking at someone and gesturing with your arms to see if someone will let you into their driving lane. I guess this is the New Merge, and I hate it.
21. Slowing down to look a the policeman on the shoulder when he has stopped someone.
22. Slowing down to look at the policeman on the shoulder when he has no one stopped.
23. Slowing down to look at an accident.
24. Stopping to look at an accident. Oh, I am sorry, no ticket here. These people should be shot, instead.
I also think the following warrant tickets:
1. Pedestrians who cross against the light and expect you to stop anyway.
2. Pedestrians who cross against the light and slow down their pace when they see they are holding up traffic.
3. Pedestrians who step in front of a moving vehicle (and not in a crosswalk) and expect to get the right of way.
4. People who park in the Fire Lane or the Pick-up Lane at the grocery store because they are too lazy to park in one of the available empty spots in the parking lot.
5. People who are not handicapped and park in the handicapped spots using someone else's handicapped driver hang-tag.
And, as a deputized person, I also plan to make the most grevious offenders re-take the driving portion of their driving test to keep their license.
So how was your day?
But tonight, even though I had the whole thing composed, I realize that as I sat down to type I simply do not have the energy to rant any more. I think they wore me out! Being surrounded by stupidity can be very tiring, obviously. Okay, okay, let me give it a try anyway!
They say you should not whine about something unless you also have a solution to suggest to correct the problem. Well, I do!!! Have a suggestion, that is. First, The Problem: Stupid drivers who do not care about the traffic laws which are there NOT to make our lives miserable, but to give some sense of order to the very dangerous task of maneuvering heavy machinery (2000+ pounds of metal on wheels counts as heavy machinery, in my book) with other people doing the same thing. There just HAVE to be rules or there would be anarchy. Apparently we have anarchy even with the rules, but I digress.
So my peeve du jour, and pretty much every jour, is that people do not follow the basic Driving 101 laws, and they think this is okay. And policemen apparently have way too much other stuff to do, so they cannot be bothered with policing the bumper-cars that is my daily commute. I swear, it's a miracle I get to and from work every day without being smashed to smithereens.
My solution? Deputize me! I will stop everyone I can and ticket them for blatantly breaking the law. And I'll do it cleverly disguised as a fellow commuter in a teeny tiny Miata. I'll keep the flashing red light hidden until I need to whip it out and make someone pull over. And I'll do it FOR FREE! I'll do it for the sheer joy of making someone see the error of their ways and put the fear of God into the rest of 'em.
What should you watch for when I have been granted my precious flashing red light? These are the things for which you will be stopped:
1. Changing lanes without using a directional (turn signal, that blinky thing).
2. Tailgating.
3. Changing lanes over and over and over again so you can get one car ahead of where you started.
4. Extra penalty for doing #3 without using a turn signal.
5. Making a one-lane exit into a two-lane exit because you are too good to wait in line like everyone else.
6. Passing on the shoulder because you cannot be bothered to wait until you get to the exit to exit.
7. Crossing a solid white line to merge.
8. Crossing a solid white line to merge without using a directional.
9. Crossing a double solid white line to merge.
10. Turning or exiting right from the left lane.
11. Sliding out of your lane while turning (you know, turning left into the far right lane.)
12. Entering the intersection when you cannot clear the intersection, even if your light is green.
13. Entering the intersection when you cannot clear the intersection when your light is red.
14. Not stopping for a stop sign (you live there, so they must be optional for you.)
15. Not stopping for pedestrians in crosswalks.
16. Tossing trash out the window while driving. This includes cigarette butts, people. Maryland is not your ashtray!
17. Crossing the double solid yellow lines in the middle of the street because a trash truck is stopped and in your way, and doing this without regard to the fact that there is oncoming traffic on the other side of said yellow lines.
18. Passing a stopped school bus with its red lights flashing because, well, just because you could, I guess.
19. Charging to the end of a merge lane so you can get as far up into traffic as you can, causing said moving traffic to stop to let you in, which backs traffic up several miles more than it already was. Forget that someone in a little green Miata left about 5 car lengths (your car lengths) of room for you to merge into moving traffic, but you were going so fast you blew past that opportunity.
20. Honking at someone and gesturing with your arms to see if someone will let you into their driving lane. I guess this is the New Merge, and I hate it.
21. Slowing down to look a the policeman on the shoulder when he has stopped someone.
22. Slowing down to look at the policeman on the shoulder when he has no one stopped.
23. Slowing down to look at an accident.
24. Stopping to look at an accident. Oh, I am sorry, no ticket here. These people should be shot, instead.
I also think the following warrant tickets:
1. Pedestrians who cross against the light and expect you to stop anyway.
2. Pedestrians who cross against the light and slow down their pace when they see they are holding up traffic.
3. Pedestrians who step in front of a moving vehicle (and not in a crosswalk) and expect to get the right of way.
4. People who park in the Fire Lane or the Pick-up Lane at the grocery store because they are too lazy to park in one of the available empty spots in the parking lot.
5. People who are not handicapped and park in the handicapped spots using someone else's handicapped driver hang-tag.
And, as a deputized person, I also plan to make the most grevious offenders re-take the driving portion of their driving test to keep their license.
So how was your day?
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