So Now What?

I recently made two different recipes that each called for a common ingredient, but in an unusual amount. With some things, like flour or butter, I'm used to varying quantities, because we see these items as "bulk" and we just use what we need and are prepared to store the rest.

Most recipes that use canned goods are written to accommodate a full can of a product. For example: a pumpkin pie calls for a can of pumpkin (it does specify what size can) and a can of evaporated milk. The recipes are written/developed that way, or the canned stuff is just made that way. Baking magic.

For Thanksgiving I made a recipe that called for 1 Cup of canned pumpkin. Um, a can has 2 cups in it. I now have a cup of canned pumpkin left over, and I either need to make that recipe again (though I didn't like it) or find one that calls for 1/2 can of pumpkin. Good luck with that.

I wouldn't be ranting, except I just made a meatball recipe that called for 1/4 Cup of evaporated milk. Um, that comes in a 12 oz can, so now I have 8 oz of evaporated milk, and ... now what?

Do I go in search of recipes that need odd amounts of evaporated milk? I suppose I could make half a pumpkin pie with my 1/2 can of pumpkin, and 6 of the 8 oz of evaporated milk, but ... sigh.

The makers of tomato paste got smart and now you can get it in a tube. This solves the problem of buying a 6 oz can and needing 1 tablespoon. I just wish everything else was that easy.

Come on, people, get with the program!

PS: If this is the rantiest I get lately, I apologize to all my readers who still even know about this blog. Retirement has settled my nerves, apparently. :)

Comcast

It's been a full year since I've felt the need to rant, but this one needs to be aired.

I'm not a (totally) unreasonable person. I generally do a little homework and exhaust all online options and get really frustrated before I'll bother to open a Live Chat window with a company. I canceled cable a few years ago since I only watched the Food Network, and once they also started hosting reality shows, I stopped watching TV all together. Lately I've heard about several shows that might interest me, so I looked into the current price of cable.

I used to pay $60+/mo for cable without any premium channels. That $60 got me local plus the general "cable" stations like Food Network, History Channel, etc.  I was looking for something low-end this time just to see if I'd even watch it enough to keep it.

I saw an online-purchase-only plan for $39.95/mo for 12 months, followed by $60/mo for the next 12 months, with a 2-year contract. Huh? I have to sign a contract to get TV? So I opened a chat window to ask.  BIG MISTAKE. It went something like this:

"Chris": Welcome to Comcast. How may I help you?
Me: I have a question about a low-end plan for Cable.
Chris: Please wait while we establish a secure connection.
[Huh? Then why did he ask how he could help me?]
Me: When did you start a 2-year contract?
Chris: May I have your address so I can see if you are in our service area?
Me: I am, I've had cable before, I just want to start it up again.
Chris: May I have your address?
Me: Can you answer the contract question without my address?
Chris: May I please have your address?
Me: {address}
Chris: {opens a Move Window button in the chat window}
Me: NOW can you answer my question about the contract?
Chris: Please move the chat window so you can see our site.
Me: I can see your site. Could you please answer my question about the contract?
Chris: Please move the chat window so you can see our site.
Me: I CAN SEE YOUR FREAKIN SITE! Now, could you please answer my question about the contract?
Chris: Please move the chat window so you can see our site.
Me: Maybe I don't need cable after all. May I please speak with your supervisor?
Chris: Please move the chat window so you can see our site.
Me: Okay, then. You have now lost a customer forever. Thanks for nothing.

So, I guess I won't be getting cable any time soon. WHY is it so freaking difficult to answer a simple question? My money is on India and a script. But geeeeeez, why do I need to move a stinkin' chat window to see the web page when I've already read the web page and that's what generated my question in the first place? Why can't the guy (or was it a girl - who really knows?) just answer my question without having to use the site to do it?

Okay, yes, my fuse was a little short, but I didn't get the feeling he was even reading my questions. He was in auto-pilot, checking my address to see if I was in the coverage area, looking to see which services were available, etc. I already told him I was in their coverage area, having had cable in the past. Oh, but he wasn't reading that part. Sorry, I forgot. Ya know, he didn't even respond to my request to speak with a supervisor.

One of these days these companies are going to figure out that outsourcing their customer disservice departments was a BAD idea. Fortunately for me, I haven't watched TV in so long, I won't miss it if I never get it back. For other people, though, they are stuck with bad service and no options. When some other option comes along, I'll look into it. For now, Comcast is dead to me.

Lines

Lines. We all dislike them, but you know what? If there is a line for something, it means there are more people wanting a particular service (demand) than that service can be provided (supply). So people wait their turn until they can be served.The next person in line is the next person to be served.

Same is true with traffic, but a little different. If there is a line, that means there are more cars that want to be somewhere than the road can handle, so people cue up and wait to merge. In general, "merge" works best with every-other-car, or, as a co-worker once said, "the zipper method". One car from one lane, one car from the next lane. Everyone keeps moving.

Let's examine the past hour of my life, where I encountered both of these situations.

First: traffic. I believe in the every-other-car merge. I ALWAYS leave a several-car opening in front of me to allow a car to merge into traffic. I also expect the car behind that one to merge in behind me. Instead, what happens most often is either (1) that second car trying to merge will speed up and zoom past the merging car so it can get closer to the front of the line. Or (2), the second car trying to merge will ride the bumper of the first car (the one I let in) and attempt to do a 2-car merge in front of me. This pisses me off. What sense of entitlement does this second person have that they can't come in behind me?

Let's move on to the people line. Standing in line at the grill for breakfast. Two people in front of me, one behind me. Cook is cooking. Two guys wander over and stand in front of the line. It's like none of us existed. As soon as the cook turned around to see who was next, these two guys actually stepped forward and started to order! The cook, thank heavens, looked to his right, saw the line, and addressed us instead. These two guys made no effort to get in line; they just stood there until the cook had asked all of us for our orders.

Now don't get me wrong. There are times I will gladly let someone in front of me, like at the grocery store checkout - when someone has only one or two items, I'll let them go ahead of me. Or in a long line in the ladies' room, I'll let someone with a small child go ahead of me. But other times? That line is there for a reason, and YOU don't get to decided you go first. The people already there before you get to make that decision. It's called civility.

I do not understand any of this, but the sense of entitlement, the sense of me-me-me, the inability to "play nice" is all starting to make me want to be a hermit and just stay home. Seriously.

Honking Horn: The New Knock

Wow, it's been a long time since my last rant. Lately, by the time I've typed them, I'm over it, so I delete the post. But tonight ... not so much.

This is about basic respect for your fellow human beings. WHAT is the deal with people sitting in front of a building honking their horn? Are they there to pick up someone? If so, why not get out of the car and knock on the door?

What really gets me is when it's a father picking up his kids for the weekend. What kind of message is this sending the kids? I don't care if the father doesn't get a long with the mother. Show your kids enough respect to go to the door and tell them you are here.

When I was in High School (a loooooong time ago), my parents told me if the guy picking me up for a date didn't respect me enough to come to the door, then I wasn't going. Simple enough, right? I never even had to say anything, as the guys I went out with were decent guys.

Fast forward a lot of years, and I have people laying on their horns in front of my building because whoever they're picking up isn't coming out of their door fast enough. After the first honk, how about you get out of the car and knock on the door? You'll get a faster response since you'll be harder to ignore.

Side benefit: the neighbors won't call the police and report you disturbing their peace.

My Thoughts On Football

Let me begin my defense for what I assume will be a deluge of hate mail, but I hate football. Well, that's not true. I hate (intensely dislike) football fans. No, that's not it, either. Okay, I have a low tolerance for people who are such rabid fans that their team can do no wrong. Yeah, that's closer.

I grew up in Ohio, but I did not attend Ohio State. I will cheer for my own college (Miami Univ), but I have no interest whatsoever in who or what or when OSU plays. When I moved to Michigan, I learned everyone was assumed to be declared for either UMich or Mich State, no matter where you actually attended college. My co-workers could not understand how *I*, a gal from Ohio, cared not for OSU. It was just not in their chemical make-up to comprehend such things.

I was the product of non-rabid fans. My Mom was from Brooklyn, and she told us a true fan stood by their team through thick or thin, win or lose. They LOVED their Dodgers, and went to the games because they were fans, not because the team was on a winning streak. She told us people lined the streets and cried when the Dodgers left town.

Nowadays, no player stays with a team for very long if they can get more money somewhere else. It is a business and I think that is what has soured me to all sports. It's more about money and winning (and drugs) than it is about playing the game.

Okay - The Washington Redskins. I am in "Redskins Rule and Cowboys $uck" territory, and it makes me crazy! One season after a loss to who-remembers-what-team, all the guys could talk about was how they would have won "if only so-and-so had not been injured" or "if that call had gone in our favor". HELLO! You LOST! Accept it and move on, okay?!

Last Friday all I heard was how Sunday was going to be a cake walk - they were playing the joke-of-a-team not-even-worth-our-time Detroit Lions. I looked it up and the Lions had not won a game in like 2 seasons. Okay, fine. But where was the sportsman-like conduct? They know not of these terms.

Imagine my GLEE yesterday when I heard Detroit had won the game! OMG, I could not WAIT to get to work and hear what people had to say. Today, all day, it was vewy, vewy qwiet ... {tee hee}

Then, as I was leaving the office, I saw the Washington Post out on a table, and glanced at the headlines:

"Washington Bails Out Detroit". Okay, guys, YOU WERE TROUNCED! But I am not surprised this was spun into a positive tone. Not one bit surprised. I am sure all week I will be listening to how "if we had only ..." excuses. Yeah, guys, write 'em down and play the game next week, okay? Do you think maybe you were just a wee bit complacent and assuming in this cake walk gig? Well, do ya?!

I am done, now. Thank you for reading.

Why?

My day, and why I need a massage every 2 weeks. I actually need it weekly, but I like to eat, so I sacrifice. Here are today's burning "Why" questions:

1. Why do you think it is okay to turn right from the left lane? Do you not see there are cars in the right lane? Do you not see the sign over your lane that indicates you may go straight or turn left ONLY? Why do you think you have the right-of-way over the cars in the right lane, or the oncoming cars turning left? Are you TOO GOOD to get in line like the rest of us and wait for the light? Where are you going that is so important that you are special?

2. Why do you think it is okay to exit left from the right lane? Do you not see there are cars in the left lane? Why is lack of planning on your part suddenly imposed on several others who have to stop to prevent them from slamming into you, thus backing up traffic even more? Are you TOO GOOD to think about the fact that there is an exit coming up and maybe you should be in the proper lane to start with?

3. Why do you wait until your merge/transition lane is gone and you are driving on the shoulder to begin your merge? Why do you feel a God-given right to stick your car into moving traffic without the benefit of a turn signal to indicate your intent? Why do you feel the need to flip the finger at everyone who failed to stop traffic to let you in? What part of this is not YOUR doing?

4. Why do you feel it is okay to cross a double solid white line (which indicates the exit has already been defined, and you are past it) and create a second lane in the one-lane exit, bypassing all the cars already legally in that lane, then push your way into the waiting cars so you can exit? Do you really need to get to work that much faster than the rest of us?

(Caution: change in topic.)

5. Why is your music on so loud that it is blaring from your ear phones to the point where you could not hear me say "excuse me" after YOU stopped dead in your tracks, totally unaware that anyone else was in the world, causing me to bump into you? Then, after you grudgingly acknowledged my existence, why did you give me the evil eye as if this was somehow MY fault?

6. Why was I so upset/confused/dismayed after listening to that NPR piece on teens so addicted to texting they felt they could not possibly be expected to drive without texting? Why do these kids feel it is okay? Even after one of them was in two serious accidents because she was texting while driving? What part of distracted driving (and to an inexperienced driver, at that) is not clear here? *I* cannot even get my cell phone out of my purse while driving without losing focus, and I have been driving 3 times longer than these kids are old! Why do they feel this would be such an imposition on their lives? What do they freaking have to say that cannot wait until they get to where you are going?!?! Is a life in danger? Then SHUT UP AND DRIVE.

7. Why, when I went to the Post Office the other day, were three out of four people on their cell phones while waiting in line? What do you have to say that cannot wait until you leave the Post Office? Do you honestly think I want to listen to your conversation about your doctor's appointment, or what you need to do when you get home, or why you think that guy likes you? Put a sock in it!

7.5. Why (while we are on the subject of the Post Office) do you think you can walk in to the PO with a shopping bag and start packaging up your item to be mailed? Did you not think of the shipping part of this when you bought the item? Are you aware that other places sell boxes and tape? Do you know how much smoother things go when your item is ready to ship before you get into line? Do you think it is the responsibility of the Postal Service worker at the window to help you tape up your package? Why can some of us manage to do this at home? And DO NOT ask me to let you in front of me in line because you have already been here so long. YOU ARE NOT IN LINE YET, so move to the end, bucko.

8. WHY did I not see those awesome Hostess cupcakes in the vending machine at work until I was leaving? I just KNOW they could have helped me fell better about all of this.

A Three-Fer Day

When I see stupidity, I start composing in my head so I can spew it all out of my system when I get home, but I usually calm down by that time (long commutes are good for something!). Alas, today was not one of those days, as all three of these 'incidents' occurred within a few miles of home.

So today I bring you a three-fer, wherein I'll spew three different rants at you. Come on in - the water's fine!

Rant #1: I was at the grocery store this evening to pick up a prescription, and as I waited in line, I noticed a sign on the counter that asked people to please end their phone conversations before they approached the counter. Basically, hang up the dang phone once it's your turn! I congratulated the Pharmacist about the sign, but he said they've actually had to take it down in the past because people complained about it.

Huh? People complained that they could not be rude and talk on the phone while someone was trying to help them with life-saving medication? What's wrong with this picture?!?!

Rant #2: I was stopped at a light and I heard a really, really, really loud radio. So loud my car was vibrating! I turned to see who was driving the car next to me (as I closed my window to drown out even a little of the brain-jarring noise), and to my surprise it was a guy on a motorcycle! I kid you not!

Okay, I drive a Miata. A Miata has a rag-top, meaning there is zero insulation between me and the great outdoors. This also means road noise is ever-present. I have a radio. I keep the radio volume so I can hear it with the windows closed, which is pretty dang low. I'll turn it up to hear the traffic report, but then I'll turn it down again...I just want something in the background.

If I open the windows, though, all bets are off. I'd have to crank that thing up to crazy-loud to hear it over the noise of open windows. I generally just listen to the wind when I drive, and I catch the news or traffic when I stop at a light (or on the "expressway"). And if the top is down, I forget about the radio all together...it would blow out normal speakers to be that loud, and anyway, part of the joy of having a rag-top is being open to the sun and breeze and enjoying nature. At least that's what *I* think, for what it's worth.

So imagine this: a motorcycle, and not a small one, with the associated engine roar; a helmeted driver; and a radio loud enough to be heard over the engine noise and through the helmet. Now imagine the volume of the same radio while stopped at a light. Yeah, it was LOUD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rant #3: There is one family in my neighborhood of condos/townhouses that feels it is their God-given right to stop their car in the middle of the street and just leave it there. I cannot figure out why, either. It's been there in the past, with all the doors open, and they've been out walking around. It's not as if there's no place to park - they just choose not to.

But tonight they appeared to be actually waiting for someone to come out. They sat there. They honked. They continued to sit there. They honked again.

Now we'll take a little trip in the way-back machine to when I was in High School. Dating Rule Number 1 in our house was this: If he does not respect you enough to come to the door to get you, then you are not going out with him. Simple. Straight to the point. And never, in all my years, did anyone I dated ever honk for me to come out. Never. I dated good guys. ;-)

Back to the present. What kind of message are these people sending to their kids that it is okay to sit in the parking lot and honk to pick up someone. Sometimes there are kids in the car, and sometimes they are picking up kids, but either way, where is the respect for anyone? I think this is just one part of what *I* think is wrong with some people today - they cannot be bothered, so it has become acceptable, and I think that is so sad.

Hey - thanks for reading this far! See, they were tiny little rants, and I am done! Typing all this out can be very cathartic. ;-)

Why?

Sign above the drinking fountain.

The drinking fountain.


I find it sad that (1) adults need to be told these things, (2) the plea was ignored, and (3) this was not an isolated incident.

Frustrating Day In Muddville

Is Muddville spelled with one or two 'd's? Sigh.

I tell ya, when I leave the office, my day is supposed to get better, not worse. But when I am surrounded by stoopid people driving objects of destruction and not paying attention, can you tell it irritates me just a little bit??!?!

First up: Lady in large View-blocker (SUV), holding cell phone in her right hand and gesturing with her left. Holding the steering wheel with ... what? Not her teeth, because her mouth never stopped moving. For miles. I even took various back roads to try and shake her, but she hugged my bumper, for miles. Amazing she did not hit me.

Next up: Woman in front of me driving 10 mph below the speed limit in the left lane. Would.not.speed.up. I could not get into the right lane to pass her because all the people behind me were doing that and cutting me off. Idiots. I finally got around her after a few miles. Grrrrrrr....

Then I went to the grocery store - had to pick up an Rx. Leaving the store, there was a car stopped in the driving lane. Well, actually, both lanes, since she was in the middle of the two lanes, just stopped. I stepped into the cross walk and looked at her to make sure she did not plan to start moving. Nope - she was too busy texting on her cell to even notice I was there. Then once I was about 2/3 of the way across, she started moving (surprise!) and turned into the lane in which I was walking. She drove reeeeal slooooowly, like she was following me to my spot, then she sped up and I looked over - still texting. She went past a few open spaces, then stopped. As a guy started to back out of his spot, she threw her vehicle into reverse and almost nailed him. WT!?! She finally took her car out of reverse and pulled into one of the empty spots - still texting. I got into my car and left, and she was ... still texting. WHO THE HELL ARE THESE PEOPLE TALKING TO!?!?!?!

Ahem.

I get to the fabric store to pick up my sharpened scissors. As the line grew longer, one of the registers closed. CLOSED. When she finally got to me, she had no clue where to find the scissors, so she abandoned her post (line still growing). She was in slow motion the whole check-out time, then she informed me that even though the ticket says $42, she knows scissor sharpening is $3, and so she did not want me to be surprised. Note: This was a huge, heavy bag, obviously containing more than one pair of scissors. I looked at her and told her that there were multiple pairs of scissors in the bag, 14 to be exact, and 14 times 3 is 42, so that is the correct amount. She just did not want me to "wonder". I know she was just trying to help, but I wonder how she gets dressed in the morning. Oh, did I mention her hair was green with blue tints?

Then I get home. I had a message from my Rx company to call. It was a very...slow...speaking...voice...on...a...recording. Did I want to hear about a program about blah, blah, blah? Speak Yes or No after the tone. No. Okay, let us tell you about this blah, blah, blah program that is included at no extra cost with your plan. (What part of No was not clear, here?) blah, blah, blah ... Would you like to reconsider your answer. NO. Well, if you ever DO wish to reconsider ... aaaaaaaaagh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And just now, as I am typing this rant, I get a phone call from another machine - this time from my Dr's office. They have this automated system that calls you - over and over and over until you respond - to confirm your appt. To continue in English, please press 1. I LIVE IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO PRESS 1 FOR ENGLISH!

Stop the world, I want to get off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I think I need a distraction. Hey, look, in just one short hour it will be my bed-time. I hope I am unwound by then .... at least typing all of this made me feel a little better. Sigh ...

Prices

Shopping for mustard seeds this week, I found the following:

1 7-ounce bag of mustard seeds at the local Asian/Indian market: $1.50
1 2.5-ounce jar of mustard seeds at the local chain grocery store: $4.29

What's wrong with this picture?

The Indian market was out of yellow mustard seeds (he said not enough Indian cooks buy them to always have them in stock), but he'll be getting some next week (apparently for us/we silly Americans.)

What in tarnation do we DO to those mustard seeds to make them so friggin' expensive!?!?! Do you think the mustard seed bottlers are union? Do you think they get more vacation and better benefits than most of us? I really have no idea, but for me, I think I'll support my local Asian market.

Well, Duh

I read this late last week and I could not believe what I was reading. I have since found other versions of the same article in the WSJ and other (usually) reputable sources, so I feel safe in sharing the article I read. Read on, and judge for yourself. [Note: The bold statements below are my doing.]

A.I.G. to Suspend Millions in Executive Payouts
By JONATHAN D. GLATER
Published: October 22, 2008

The beleaguered insurer American International Group has agreed to suspend payments to executives from a $600 million bonus fund as well as $19 million in payments to its former chief executive, the New York attorney general announced on Wednesday.

The moves are the latest steps in an effort by the attorney general, Andrew M. Cuomo, to prevent bonuses and other compensation to former executives at A.I.G., which in recent weeks has received tens of billions of dollars in loans from the Federal Reserve.

“There should not even be any contemplation of bonuses for executive performance because I find it hard to conceive of a situation that you could justify a performance bonus for management that virtually bankrupted the company,” Mr. Cuomo said on a conference call with reporters on Wednesday afternoon.

Regulators and lawmakers have pointed to A.I.G. as an example of excessive greed in corporate America. Although the Treasury Department is imposing limits on compensation to the most highly paid executives at companies that receive government aid, the limits do not address compensation paid in the past or under pre-existing employment contracts.

In A.I.G.’s case, according to Mr. Cuomo’s office, it is unlikely that the limits in the bailout legislation would apply because the company has received money in the form of loans from the Fed, not from transactions with the Treasury Department.

According to a letter Mr. Cuomo sent to A.I.G.’s current chief executive, Edward M. Liddy, the company has agreed to freeze $19 million in remaining payments to Martin J. Sullivan, the company’s former chief executive who was ousted in June. Mr. Cuomo said he did not know how much Mr. Sullivan might have already been paid under his employment contract.

The company also agreed not to make any payments from a $600 million deferred compensation and bonus fund for executives of A.I.G.’s financial products unit, which undertook many of the complex financial transactions that pushed the company to the brink of collapse. Mr. Cuomo said that Joseph Cassano, who headed that unit, stood to receive $70 million from the fund.

“We have received the letter, and the letter is consistent with our discussions with the attorney general and with actions we have taken,” said Joe Norton, a spokesman for A.I.G.

Mr. Cuomo has already called on A.I.G. to help recover payments made to former executives at the company. During the call with reporters, Mr. Cuomo suggested that his actions offered a template for dealing with executive compensation at companies now receiving taxpayer money through the bailout approved by Congress this month.

“Once a company accepts tax dollars, there are different rules,” Mr. Cuomo said. “These are taxpayers who did not voluntarily make an investment in these companies. In many ways it was a forced investment.”

The suspension of payments appears to be the product of negotiation between Mr. Cuomo’s office and A.I.G., but last week the attorney general raised the prospect of using New York law to recover past payments to executives whether the company cooperated or not.

A.I.G.’s spending drew national attention this month after two former executives testified before Congress about pay practices and outsize spending that continued even after the company received an $85 billion bridge loan from the Federal Reserve.

One particular point of contention was a weeklong retreat that a subsidiary, AIG General, held for sales agents. The $442,000 in expenses included $150,000 for food and $23,000 in spa charges. A.I.G., which received an additional $37.8 billion loan from the Fed, later canceled 160 conferences and other events that would have cost more than $8 million.

[PS: I think I like Mr. Cuomo.]

Smile!

This is not a b1tch; it's more of a question...something that bugs me.

When I saw this picture in People Magazine a few weeks ago, I had to stop and stare.

The question begging to be asked here is: Do you think they practice those fake smiles in front of their mirrors? Do you know anyone who actually smiles like that? Do you think men find these smiles attractive? Do you think anyone does?

What's the point? I am truly perplexed.

(They are smiles, right?)